Rewire your brain with this simple exercise

Our brains are primitively wired for survival. What this means is we naturally tend to focus our attention on the "negative" things that happen and, relatedly, things that are outside of our control. This is so that our minds can engage in problem-solving and analyzing to try to prepare us to conquer future situations that may arise. Unfortunately, because of this habit of our minds we may find ourselves getting caught up in excessive worry and unnecessary rumination. This tendency also keeps us from being engaged in the present moment where so many positive things are happening. Together this can put a real damper on our quality of life. 

The good news is that our brains are malleable--you've probably heard of the term neuroplasticity, which gets at this idea that our brains have the capacity to change and be rewired through our daily actions. Even more good news is that we can start rewiring our brains right now and by only taking a few minutes out of our day by building this science-backed, simple and healthy habit: gratitude practice.

Gratitude practice has been well-researched over the last several decades and has both immediate and long-term benefits in reducing negative affective states like depression and anxiety and increasing positive affect and overall quality of life. I have been committed to my own daily gratitude practice consistently for almost 2 years now and can attest to these significantly meaningful benefits; otherwise, I wouldn't be preaching to you about starting a practice for yourself!

Here are some simple steps to help you be most successful in starting and maintaining this practice. First, pick a time of day that is most realistic for you to commit to this practice--realistic meaning that you feel at least 80% confident that you can consistently practice at this time of day. I fold gratitude practice into my morning routine because that works best for me personally, but others might find it more realistic to do it mid-day or as part of their bedtime routine. Side note: when it comes to successfully building and especially maintaining any habit (e.g., physical exercise, meditation, journaling, etc.), consistency matters most which is why I like to say to choose what's realistic for you and why exact time of day shouldn't be the priority.

Second, obtain a journal you can call your gratitude journal or, if you prefer and it's more realistic for you, download one of the many gratitude journal apps you can search and find on your app store, or even start a notes tab in your phone that you can label your gratitude journal. Then, reflect on and write or type out at least 3 moments that day for which you feel grateful. If you're practicing in the morning or afternoon, then you'll reflect on moments from the day before, and if you're practicing in the evening, then you'll reflect on moments from earlier that day. Notice how I said moments for which you feel grateful--many of the studies researched on gratitude document the "3 good things" exercise which leaves room for broader statements. However, I like to narrow it even further to specific moments, which has both motivated and enhanced my ability to be engaged in the present moment (I'll share another blog soon about mindfulness practice, stay tuned!) and find gratitude in even the simplest of moments. To me, that has truly facilitated my "awakening" on my spiritual healing journey. 

Here's a personal example of my gratitude journaling today, during which I reflected on moments from yesterday for which I'm grateful: sharing a funny photo with a group of friends I had gotten together with the day prior and associated laughter and joy, coming up close to a flock of Canadian geese at this beautiful lake I went to for a baby shower, when I clicked to post a new TikTok video after practicing and editing it, and the moments shared with my partner about important things he's taught me and the associated feelings of love and gratitude in my heart.

I think an important thing to add here is that you're not only reflecting on those moments, but also really trying to feel and be present with feelings of gratitude, love, joy, pride, etc. that may come up in this exercise while you're engaging in reflection of certain memories. Because you can't really be grateful if you don't allow yourself to really start to feel that gratitude. Naturally, it may be more challenging at first, but before you know it, it'll become automatic and things you may have normally overlooked will bring about positive experiences of joy, love, and gratitude. Now that's how to amplify your quality of life without spending a dime!

OK, just one final thought/guidance for now. As you start to advance your practice, where you'll really make a significant impact in your quality of life is training your brain to be grateful for the more "unpleasant" moments of the day. If you can start to find appreciation for those uncomfortable feelings and "negative" things that happen, that is where you can experience tremendous growth. It's much easier for us to point out the more positive moments--ones that involve laughter, joy, love, pride, and connection, for instance--than it is for us to find gratitude in the more difficult ones. For me, training my mind to find appreciation for those more difficult experiences has brought about a sense of personal strength, whereas what I would originally automatically label as "negative" experiences have instead become reframed as opportunities or challenges to practice being grateful and trusting of myself and the journey I am going through. 

Give it a try and practice by sharing in the comments moments from yesterday you're grateful for--there are no right or wrongs here. And, as always, be patient with and kind towards yourself as you're starting this habit. Habits take time to build, meaning it's normal to not be practicing this exercise consistently right off the get-go; if this is the case, gently check in with yourself about possible barriers and solutions to those barriers. Did you forget and might benefit from setting a reminder? Is the time of day you chose perhaps not as realistic as you had thought? Would you feel more motivated if you had a loved one in the know about your intention to start practicing so you can have some accountability? Whatever it is, it's OK and you're doing just fine! As always, I'm here to support you in whatever way you need, too.